The fact that she uses the word "losing" gives it a distasteful feeling. The first line gives me the feeling that she used to be a certain person ("had a way then") but is now different and she had to change herself ("losing it all on my own"). I think Ellie is extraordinarily talented.Īpr 15th 2012 had a way then losing it all on my own
This is obviously a very dark interpretation but I think it's relevant. I think this speaks to when her siblings slept in a room close by hers but had no idea what was going on and the locking of a door was significant of her abuser. In an unlocked place the only time I feel safe" "And I think back to when my brother and my sister slept Maybe this means she's trying to comfort herself after the abuse has happened. "Touch my own skin and hope that I'm still breathing" This is what I imagine a child does when something bad is happening (to them, around them, etc.) and they don't want to think about it. I think she's talking about how the memories are haunting her and she doesn't want to deal with the emotional damage the abuse caused. "'Cause they're calling, calling, calling me home" Obviously is saying she's trying to be strong until the abuser leaves.or she does. "And so I tell myself that I'll be strong She turns to stone because she knows what's coming. I think this talks about the abuse specifically. "You show the lights that stop me turn to stone I think here she talks about how darkness is the enemy because that's when the abuse takes place and she's losing hope.
"And I'm not sleeping now the dark is too hard to beatĪnd I'm not keeping now the strength I need to push me" I think speaks to how her childhood was taken from her and how her heart was hardened. I had a heart then but the queen has been overthrown" "I had a way then losing it all on my own
I've read many opinions and they are all very thought provoking but this is the one that makes the most sense to me. I feel that this speaks to the sexual abuse of children.
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